Why didn't anyone tell me?

This post is specifically for my first time pregnant friends. Most of the time, I feel as though I can't give out advice or suggestions because I haven't really been in the baby game for long enough. And I've only had one, so what do I know?

I'm telling you this because no one told me. Or maybe somewhere along the way, someone mentioned it, but I had no idea. Here it is:

The first weeks are going to be rough. I mean, hardest thing you've ever done, rough. I don't care if you've ran a marathon- or even ran to the marathon then ran home after it- this is gonna be harder.

Many times I heard "Oh you're gonna love being a Mommy!" I guess they just forgot about those first couple of weeks. And they were right, I love being a Mommy. Now. Now that Andrew's close to being 3 months old. Now that Andrew can sleep 6 hours a night. Now that Andrew smiles and giggles.

Don't get me wrong. I loved my Baby Boy from day one. But I remember my Mom asking me when he was about a month old/4 weeks: "Is it fun or does it still feel like work?" At that point, I was on the fence- Andrew was getting into a pattern for eating and sleeping. He had a fleeting smile. Had she asked in Week 2, the answer would have been "WORK." And I only would have been able to say "work." There wouldn't have been an accompanying sentence.

And I had it pretty good. I have a husband who took an active role right from the start. He was pretty good about catching me before a meltdown. I had meals that were delivered by friends. I had my Mother-in-Law who cooked and cleaned, and stayed for more than a week, 4 days after he was born. The day she left, my Mom came and stayed for a week. I had ample help. I had friends that came over and offered to help. I was, and still am, blessed with a plentiful support system.

So here's my advice:

1. Stay in the hospital as long as they let you. A good hospital will provide you with supplies (diapers, wipes, etc.) and food. I got lucky and the food was good. You'll come home and have a million questions. The hospital is staffed 24/7.

2. When people offer their services- take them up on it. Don't feel like you're being a burden or asking too much... within reason. They offered to help you, they meant it! Especially if I offer to help you. (Be sure to say Thank You, or atleast mutter something that sounds like it before you go back to bed.)

3. Seriously, sleep when your baby sleeps. Find someone you trust to watch your sleeping baby. There's no use in handing him/her over to find yourself worrying about him/her in the care of someone you don't trust.

4. If you're breastfeeding and a problem arises (or something comes up that you think is a problem)- GET HELP. It's not supposed to hurt.

Here are my words of encouragement:

1. You can do it. You will survive this. Remember all those scraggly women at WalMart with their children? Yeah... you can do it too.

2. It will get easier. You'll figure things out for you, your baby, and your family. You'll realize what works, and even quicker- what doesn't. You'll ease into a manageable routine. Eventually, you will be able to take a full shower AND shave your legs.

3. If you're feeling too overwhelmed- talk to someone. If it doesn't get better, talk to a professional. The best thing for your baby is a healthy momma.

4. It will become fun. Your baby will smile, and in that second you'll feel like a champion. Remember that marathon analogy I made earlier? It'll feel like you won it. First place, no doubt. It's all worth it.

So Amanda, Lindsay, Margarita, and those that are still keeping it a secret:

Call me. Anytime. Day or night. Even if it's 3 or 4 AM. I'm here to listen, and if I can, help. Because it's gonna be tough and you're gonna want help.